*sigh*
So, once again, my life is going.... crazy.
We're packing because we're moving at the end of the month, I need to learn how to drive and stuff (and see the house), Mom's mad at me for my grades and because I like to go out jogging when it's dark (like I really have time to when the sun's shining (ew sunshine....sunshine + me = sunburn)), and today, I had a day-long anxiety attack because I was supposed to do the monologue I wrote for theatre today. I didn't do it, but I still suffered. And people were filming their friends and taking pictures of them in theatre, and I would've been included in the filming/picturing, but I avoid cameras of any kind like the plague. Very few pictures of me (outside of the ones that are required of me to have done) exist, and that's because I look like a fat ugly cow on film, plain and simple. I don't like seeing myself looking like a fat, ugly cow. It's bad enough for me to just think I'm fat and ugly; seeing it evidenced on film doesn't make me feel any better about myself. Anyway....
....Kitty-Cat did something extremely rash, and is now having second thoughts. I'm kinda glad to hear that's she's having second thoughts, because I'm firmly against the establishment she's getting herself into, and if she's having second thoughts, then maybe it won't happen. And even though I want to be tactful about this, I'm going to say it outright, because I'm tired of dancing around subjects and being tactful: WHY ARE YOU GETTING MARRIED, CAT?!?! You've only known Dan for a year at best, and while you may feel like you love him deeply and everything will be fine, a year is NOTHING in the grand scheme of things!!! My cousin has dated the same man for eight years, is currently living with him, and still isn't even engaged!! You've only known Dan less than a year or so, haven't truly lived a moment with him, and you're planning on walking down the aisle!! Now, don't get me wrong; I love you as a friend, and I want you to be happy, and I know that Dan makes you feel happy, but you're only in your early twenties. You've got so much going on, and so much left to do, and I thought you had more sense than this. Surely you can think about it? Maybe (if you really think marrying Dan is the right choice) drag the engagement out for a really really long time? I've seen ugly divorces before, Cat, and for the most part, they came about because the couple got married when they were young. I don't want to see you go through an ugly divorce. I don't want to see you get roped into something that very easily promises to be a very bad decsion. Yes, some of my thoughts on marriage are coming into this; "no such thing as 'happily ever after' love", "ball and chain", "eternal suffering", "never truly happy", and "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"
are among them, thus making my opinion even more than it is. I suppose that all I'm trying to say is that you're getting yourself into something that I'm not sure a twenty-year-old is ready for. If you do wed him, then I will support you, and I will always be here for you, but know that I really really really don't like the idea of this at all, and I hope something will change your mind.
And, well, that's about it.
Ciao for now,
Chii-chan
)O(
So, once again, my life is going.... crazy.
We're packing because we're moving at the end of the month, I need to learn how to drive and stuff (and see the house), Mom's mad at me for my grades and because I like to go out jogging when it's dark (like I really have time to when the sun's shining (ew sunshine....sunshine + me = sunburn)), and today, I had a day-long anxiety attack because I was supposed to do the monologue I wrote for theatre today. I didn't do it, but I still suffered. And people were filming their friends and taking pictures of them in theatre, and I would've been included in the filming/picturing, but I avoid cameras of any kind like the plague. Very few pictures of me (outside of the ones that are required of me to have done) exist, and that's because I look like a fat ugly cow on film, plain and simple. I don't like seeing myself looking like a fat, ugly cow. It's bad enough for me to just think I'm fat and ugly; seeing it evidenced on film doesn't make me feel any better about myself. Anyway....
....Kitty-Cat did something extremely rash, and is now having second thoughts. I'm kinda glad to hear that's she's having second thoughts, because I'm firmly against the establishment she's getting herself into, and if she's having second thoughts, then maybe it won't happen. And even though I want to be tactful about this, I'm going to say it outright, because I'm tired of dancing around subjects and being tactful: WHY ARE YOU GETTING MARRIED, CAT?!?! You've only known Dan for a year at best, and while you may feel like you love him deeply and everything will be fine, a year is NOTHING in the grand scheme of things!!! My cousin has dated the same man for eight years, is currently living with him, and still isn't even engaged!! You've only known Dan less than a year or so, haven't truly lived a moment with him, and you're planning on walking down the aisle!! Now, don't get me wrong; I love you as a friend, and I want you to be happy, and I know that Dan makes you feel happy, but you're only in your early twenties. You've got so much going on, and so much left to do, and I thought you had more sense than this. Surely you can think about it? Maybe (if you really think marrying Dan is the right choice) drag the engagement out for a really really long time? I've seen ugly divorces before, Cat, and for the most part, they came about because the couple got married when they were young. I don't want to see you go through an ugly divorce. I don't want to see you get roped into something that very easily promises to be a very bad decsion. Yes, some of my thoughts on marriage are coming into this; "no such thing as 'happily ever after' love", "ball and chain", "eternal suffering", "never truly happy", and "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"
are among them, thus making my opinion even more than it is. I suppose that all I'm trying to say is that you're getting yourself into something that I'm not sure a twenty-year-old is ready for. If you do wed him, then I will support you, and I will always be here for you, but know that I really really really don't like the idea of this at all, and I hope something will change your mind.
And, well, that's about it.
Ciao for now,
Chii-chan
)O(
